Chapter 33: Born Human! I’m So Sorry! The Female Ghost Has Met the Toughest Customer of Her Life! [Please Vote for the Monthly Ticket]

While everyone was taking a break, a series of keywords related to "Run Man" began to sprout like bamboo shoots after a spring rain, rapidly dominating the trending searches.

Exposure resources that were usually worth their weight in gold were now, without any behind-the-scenes manipulation, achieving an unprecedented level of saturation on the trending list.

#Reba Shoveled!#
#The Biggest Disaster in Entertainment History!#
#The Has-been Has Changed!#
#@Sister Zheng, the past sycophant Ming is dead. Is this the idol you picked?!#
#Nothing is Craziest, Only Crazier!#
#Has-been drinking, situation dire; Has-been drunk, life or death uncertain!#
#……#

When the gossiping masses saw the number one trending topic, they were stunned. Was this "shoveled" the "shoveled" they understood?

Netizens rushed to get the scoop. Although the content of the topic differed slightly from their wild imaginations, when they saw the GIF of Lu Ming decisively using a sliding tackle to send Reba into a mud pit—and following up with an unhesitating strike—the internet exploded!

In the past, even if a female celebrity wasn't particularly good-looking or was getting on in years, she would be treated like a star on variety shows, receiving endless care and protection from everyone else. This phenomenon had become the norm in the entertainment industry and was a consensus everyone defaulted to. After all, in front of the cameras, everyone wrapped themselves in thick disguises, doing their best to coat themselves in a positive aura.

Someone like Lu Ming, who refused to walk the beaten path, was truly a rare specimen in the history of the industry!

Such explosive program effects quickly drew netizens to the Kiwifruit platform to set reminders for the evening's live broadcast. Even those who hadn't used the app in years, or who had never used it at all, flocked to the app store to download it, eager to witness the "has-been's" style.

Before the broadcast even started, people were already frantically signing up for VIP memberships!

Wang Gang, CEO of Kiwifruit, looked at the unprecedented situation where the program's buzz was driving a surge in new users and breaking multiple historical daily revenue records. His mouth stretched from ear to ear: "Is this a has-been? This is a walking God of Wealth!"

*Ding-ding-ding!*

The phone rang. Wang Gang saw it was a business partner. After happily answering, he heard the voice of the Jiangzhe Station Director, full of jealousy: "You've made a fortune today, haven't you?"

"A little, just a little..." Wang Gang waved his hand dismissively, though he couldn't hide the joy in his tone.

Television stations couldn't live-stream, and watching Kiwifruit board a rocket to riches made the entire management team at Jiangzhe Station green with envy.

After a few pleasantries, the Director got straight to the point:
"We've signed a new exclusive title sponsorship. The sponsor doesn't want to miss this buzz and requires that every guest read the ad copy during tonight's live broadcast. I've notified everyone, and the others have no problem. It's just that 'has-been'—I'm worried he'll cause some trouble. You brought him in; I need your help to push this through."

Gangzi shook his head: "If you're worried about accidents, why go to all that trouble? Why not just have the other guests do it?"

"Do you think I don't want to?" the Director confessed. "The sponsor said they don't care if the others slack off, but that has-been must use 120% of his professional capability to get it done!"

"I haven't been in contact with him..." Gangzi was at a loss.

"..."

Seeing the silence on the other end, he thought for a moment. He didn't want to make things difficult for the TV station. After all, they owned the show's copyright, and they were ultimately just acting as agents for the online broadcast rights. The recording stage had already become an unexpectedly massive hit, earning the platform enough traffic to threaten the status of the "Big Brother" networks in the near future.

With such a bright future ahead, it wouldn't be right for him to eat all the meat while the Jiangzhe team, who had done all the heavy lifting, didn't even get a sip of soup.

"Tell you what, what is the brand? I'll call him personally and arrange it for you."

The Director’s voice softened: "Fenqile. Joy in moderation, joy in seeing better. If you lack money, find Fenqile; simple and happy!"

"..." After a moment of silence, Wang Gang said gloomily, "As expected of the big shots, you guys are ruthless!"

"Same to you." A strained laugh came from the other side. He knew exactly what Wang Gang was implying.

Honestly, as a terrestrial TV station, they wouldn't normally touch these ads, but the pay was just too good. Now, the sponsor was their principle.

After hanging up, Wang Gang got Lu Ming's private number and dialed. Five minutes later, he sat at his desk with a strange expression, feeling hesitant.

He didn't know if it was because the "has-been" was still hungover, or if he was genuinely willing to give him this favor, but despite Wang Gang hinting several times that he could use this opportunity to ask for a fee, Lu Ming didn't take the bait. He acted as if he didn't understand, yet gave a firm guarantee that he would take care of it. Even though the task was settled, Gangzi still felt uneasy.

Just then, the Director called again, clearly very concerned.

"Well? Is it done?"

"It's done. He said he'd take care of it!"

"That's great! When the show ends, I must meet this has-been in person and give him a big red envelope to encourage him!"

"..."

...

Seven o'clock in the evening.

The Kiwifruit live room was packed. As soon as the feed went live, the online viewer count exceeded the peak from the afternoon. The explosive popularity made even the staff from Penguin and Kuying, who were lurking to spy, exclaim in shock.

Sister Zheng, who had nothing better to do today, called her agent and her assistant to gather in her luxury mansion to watch the broadcast.

"That has-been is way too popular now."

"How can he not be? Ever since he started recording 'Run Man,' our sister has been pushed onto the trending list every few days. If he wasn't a has-been, I wouldn't believe how high his commercial value would be!"

"If he repents and takes advantage of the current buzz to apologize and start a fake romance with Sister Zheng, it would probably be a legendary story in the industry, right?"

Listening to the agent and assistant, Sister Zheng dug her nails into an orange, juice spilling everywhere:
"Heh, just because he comes back to apologize doesn't mean I have to forgive him! I've never been interested in being tied to him!"

"Even if he's popular now, it's just surface-level glory. The cocktail brand he ruined is suing the company for a billion in damages! Don't talk about this traffic being temporary; even if he lived off negative publicity for a lifetime, he couldn't pay off such a massive debt. A sycophant is doomed!"

"I heard he tore off his 'sycophant' label today. Isn't that obviously just a performance? It's hilarious that the clueless netizens outside actually believe it."

"I want to see what happens after this show is recorded, he goes bankrupt, and Huayue bans him. Let's see how he survives when he cries for help and no one answers!"

The agent and assistant immediately sobered up.

That's right. Although the has-been looked glorious now, and his popularity rivaled his peak days as a top idol, they agreed with Sister Zheng's reasoning.

In the face of capital and a giant like Huayue, an individual with zero real strength and whose popularity relied entirely on clowning around was destined to have no chance of competing.

...

After the broadcast started, the members of the three teams were blindfolded as soon as they entered Happy Valley. They were forcibly separated and taken to isolated areas to wait.

Shortly after, a broadcast voice echoed over Happy Valley:
"The game begins! Members, please remove your blindfolds!"

After Lu Ming removed his blindfold, he found himself in a pitch-black environment where he couldn't even see his own fingers.

"???"
"Hello? Is anyone there?"
"Where the hell is this? It's so dark, how am I supposed to get out?"

Lu Ming felt around in confusion. The next second, he touched something hard and round. Before he could react, eerie and bone-chilling ghostly wails erupted all around him!

"..." He was silent for three seconds, then gave a desolate smile: "I think I know where I am!"
"Is the PD there? I know you are; hurry up and turn on a flashlight!"

His call received no response.

Listening to the wails, Lu Ming felt inexplicably afraid. He was the type of person who started shivering when scared, and once he started shivering, he felt cold. And when he felt cold, he wanted a drink!

When he went on shows, he could leave anything behind, but his booze had to be with him.

Lu Ming reached into his pocket, pulled out a small silver hip flask, unscrewed it, and took a deep gulp.

[Ding! Detected host is drinking 'Feitian Moutai', "Vocal Foundation" +30!]
[Ding! Detected host is drinking 'Feitian Moutai', "Acting Foundation" +40!]
[[Acting Foundation] Advancement: LV1!]

That's right, the flask contained 53% alcohol-by-volume Moutai.

For this trip, Lu Ming had brought two bottles of Moutai. Considering this was the final segment of the first episode's recording, he had decided to pour one into his flask to enjoy.

Good stuff is good stuff; the significant increase in proficiency was proof of that.

As the scorching white spirit went down his throat, Lu Ming felt as if he had swallowed a red-hot branding iron. His whole body felt feverish and restless!

Even though the ghostly wails around him were still terrifying, Lu Ming wasn't afraid anymore.

He held the irregular sphere he’d found in the dark in one hand and his flask in the other, taking another sip. Just then, a white beam of light suddenly appeared in front of him, along with a pale, hideous face!

Lu Ming's pupils contracted!

The white light vanished, plunging the surroundings back into darkness. With the sound of high heels clicking on the floor, an inexplicable fear surged in his heart. Just as he was at a loss, the white light appeared again. This time, it illuminated a white dress stained with large patches of blood!

As the flashlight beam moved from bottom to top, Lu Ming clearly saw that the thing he had been clutching in his right hand was a gruesome, blood-stained skull!

"I'm sorry for being born human!"

The female ghost: "?"

The next second, to the ghost's shock, Lu Ming used all his might to launch the skull like a cannonball toward the flashlight beam!

*BANG!*
"Aaaah!"

A sharp scream echoed through the empty space. Then, with a "clatter," the beam vanished. Lu Ming heard the flashlight rolling on the ground.

He stepped forward into the darkness and soon felt someone lying on the floor. After a bit of fumbling, he found the flashlight against the wall. He pressed the button, and a hideous, terrifying face appeared before him. The girl's makeup was very creepy, but unfortunately, lying motionless on the floor, she had no offensive power.

Lu Ming gently patted her cheek and sighed: "You're in this state, yet you still imitate ghost wails before you 'die'? You're more dedicated than my useless Teacher Huang. If he had your attitude, he would have made something of himself long ago."

"Wake up, wake up!"

Lu Ming shook the girl twice to wake her up. But as soon as he shook her, a large pool of scarlet blood spilled from under her body. Lu Ming thought it was a blood bag the NPC used for realism, but when he smelled the thick, metallic scent of blood, his expression changed drastically:
"Help! Someone help! The NPC is bleeding!"
"Someone's died!!"

The director and writers monitoring this scene in the back were stunned.

They had arranged such a unique starting point for Lu Ming out of personal spite. To create the best horror atmosphere, they had even sent the PDs away. They wanted to see Lu Ming make a fool of himself, but they never expected that not only would the has-been not be scared, but the NPC would be the one in trouble!

"Go save her!" the writer urged anxiously.

The director was pale and at a loss. Then he saw the NPC who had been "lying dead" suddenly wake up. He stopped his partner: "Wait, let's hear what they're saying!"

On the monitor, the female ghost looked at Lu Ming, gasping for breath: "Has... Has-been brother, I'm not dead!"

"But you're bleeding so much!" Lu Ming was terrified.

"It's okay, Has-been brother. I have this every month. The way you shook me just now made my period leak..."

Lu Ming: "..."
Directing team: "..."

"Your constitution... is quite vigorous."
"It's... it's alright!"

[I'm dying of laughter. 'Period leak'? Do even the NPCs have such good lines now?]
[You can always trust the has-been's program effects. This kid might not have a life, but he’ll always have content!]
[I've seen many people play in haunted houses, but this is the first time I've seen someone counter-kill an NPC!]
[I was ready to see the has-been pee his pants, and you show me this?]
[Teacher Huang: Even though I'm not human, you are truly a dog!]
[I thought the has-been was in trouble when he started in the haunted house, but he started 'killing' things instead? Is that even allowed?]
[He really was in trouble—the NPC ran into the biggest disaster of her career!]

After helping the girl up, with the light of the flashlight, he began to tour the haunted house. In the process, he even found several boxes placed by the production team, but unfortunately, they were all empty.

The girl, whose period had leaked from his vigorous shaking, kept popping up, wailing and lying down to harass him. Half an hour later, she played a big one, hanging upside down from the ventilation duct, but due to overexertion, she crashed headfirst onto the floor...

Seeing Lu Ming still unmoved, the girl was about to cry:
"Brother, just pretend to be scared, okay? Otherwise, I'm afraid the other ghosts will mock me behind my back tomorrow. I really can't show my face in the ghost circle anymore, wuwuwu..."

"My dear, it's not that you're not scary, it's that my threshold is a bit high."
"How about this: find me a zombie costume, then crawl into the gap under this coffin later. I promise you'll be trending tonight and become the Ghost Queen of Happy Valley from now on!"

The girl's eyes lit up: "For real?"
"For real! More real than pure gold!"

Hearing this, the girl excitedly went to find costumes. Before long, she was so meticulous that she even brought makeup tools.

Lu Ming used the clues he had collected earlier as props, placing them in the coffin, on the ceiling, and in other conspicuous places in the haunted house as lures.

After finishing, with the NPC's help, he put on makeup. Once he was sure he looked truly terrifying, he settled the girl in and lay down in a coffin in another room, waiting quietly for a victim to take the bait.

...