Chapter 142: Zhanbo’s Girlfriend (Please Subscribe, Please Vote)

"Go!" Hu Yifei shot Xiao Xie a glare, then turned to Zhanbo and said, "Having a rival is actually a good thing."

Zhanbo’s face was twisted in exasperation. "But yesterday, he was bragging to me that he’s about to receive the Annual Outstanding Contribution Award, and that CEOs from all over the world will present it to him!"

"Such a big shot, how come I don’t know him?" Xiao Xie laughed. Anyone who could spin such wild tales was certainly one of a kind—and even more remarkable was that Zhanbo actually believed him.

Xiao Xie asked Zhanbo, "Heh, Zhanbo, you’re the only one who’d believe such nonsense. Let me guess, when he told you this, there was no one else around, or if there was, his voice was very low, right?"

"How did you know?" Zhanbo asked in surprise. Indeed, when Zhao Wuliang told him, there was no one else nearby.

"Come on, brother. How could you believe something so ridiculous? I knew you weren’t the brightest, but I didn’t realize it was this bad." Xiao Xie looked at Zhanbo, both amused and exasperated. "He’s obviously just boasting, isn’t he? Outstanding Contribution Award? What did he even contribute? And CEOs from all over the world? Do you know how many CEOs there are out there? Besides, how come I don’t remember ever giving him an award?"

"Ah! So he lied to me?" Zhanbo finally realized he'd been duped.

"... " Xiao Xie shrugged. What else could he say about Zhanbo’s innocence?

Zhanbo shook his head, agitated. "None of that matters now—the real problem is that tomorrow is his birthday!"

Zeng Xiaoxian, startled by Zhanbo’s words, asked, "You’re competing for that too?"

"No!" Zhanbo cried in frustration. "He announced to the whole office today that tomorrow at noon his girlfriend will bring him a big birthday cake!"

"So?" Zeng Xiaoxian looked at Zhanbo, baffled.

"Oh, you poor thing. When it’s your birthday, I’ll buy you a big cake too—as long as you’re not allergic to cream," Hu Yifei teased.

"I’m not talking about the cake! You still don’t get it. If even Zhao Wuliang has a girlfriend—oh my god!—that means I’m the only idiot in the whole company who’s never had a relationship!" Lu Zhanbo cried out in utter despair.

"Hahahaha..."

The three—Xiao Xie, Hu Yifei, and Zeng Xiaoxian—burst into laughter at Zhanbo’s outcry.

After their laughter subsided, Hu Yifei asked in surprise, "Wait, are you saying even that African colleague who’s allergic to sunlight has a girlfriend?"

"Yes!" Zhanbo nodded, both grieved and indignant. "He told a girl, 'I must stay in the dark or I’ll die!' And then… they got together. Oh, heavens!"

Hu Yifei couldn’t help but ask, "So what are you going to do?"

"Forget it. I’ve decided not to go to work tomorrow. I’ll ask the doctor for a sick note and say I’ve caught a cold," Zhanbo said, pacing anxiously around the living room.

Suddenly, Zhanbo realized this excuse wouldn’t last long enough, so he changed his mind: "No, I’ll say I was poisoned by fake milk powder and go to the hospital for kidney stones! That way I can stay away from the office for a month, until everyone forgets about this! I really don’t want to be everyone’s laughingstock!"

It was actually a pretty good strategy. Ostriches reportedly do this when they can’t face reality, and it seems to work. But how was Zhanbo so sure people would forget in a month? Xiao Xie mused, thoroughly amused.

"Zhanbo, you need to find a girlfriend!" Hu Yifei said, flipping through a magazine.

"Are you sure he can manage that? Every time he tries to talk to a girl, he gets all shy and awkward, like someone recovering from a stroke," Xiao Xie remarked, recalling Zhanbo’s attempts at flirting, unable to help his resignation.

"Uh..." Hu Yifei considered Zhanbo’s behavior and couldn’t help but feel equally hopeless. Xiao Xie wasn’t wrong.

Just as Hu Yifei was about to give up, inspiration struck. She exclaimed, "Wait, Zhao Wuliang doesn’t know me—I could pretend to be your girlfriend!"

With that, Hu Yifei threw herself at Zhanbo in a mock flirtatious manner. Zhanbo, seeing her act, shuddered, "No, no, sis! My goosebumps are falling off!"

At that moment, Lin Wanyu opened the door and entered, smiling. "I’m back! Xiao Xie is here too!"

"Welcome back," Xiao Xie smiled at Lin Wanyu in greeting.

Seeing Wanyu return, Hu Yifei excitedly asked, "Hey, Wanyu, be honest—do we look like a couple?" She grabbed Zhanbo’s arm, feigning a delicate, dependent pose.

Wanyu paused, set her bag down, and replied seriously, "Feifei, that’s a crime in America. You could be jailed!"

"What are you talking about!" Hu Yifei pushed Zhanbo away and explained, "I’m just helping him act out a scene so he won’t be discriminated against."

"If you act, he won’t just be discriminated against—his whole company will hold a moment of silence for him," Zeng Xiaoxian chimed in.

"Not convinced? Try it yourself!" Hu Yifei glared at Zeng Xiaoxian.

Wanyu clapped and laughed, "In America, relationships between the same sex are actually quite open!"

Zeng Xiaoxian and Zhanbo exchanged glances, suddenly feeling a tightening discomfort and instinctively shying away.

"I think I’m quite suitable, actually. Even though I’m a bit older, based on temperament and looks, I could easily pass for someone born in the nineties!" Hu Yifei said with self-assurance, patting Zhanbo’s shoulder. "So, Zhanbo, do you want me to play the irresistible heartthrob, the sweet girl, or the rock chick?"

"Yifei, stop tormenting Zhanbo. Can’t you see he’s about to cry?" Xiao Xie interjected, seeing Zhanbo on the verge of tears.

"Mind your own business!" Hu Yifei rolled her eyes at Xiao Xie but decided to spare Zhanbo for now.

"Perhaps I could help Zhanbo," Wanyu volunteered after some thought.

Zhanbo, overjoyed, hurried to Wanyu’s side. "Wanyu, you’re willing to help me? Thank you so much!"

Zhanbo liked Wanyu to begin with, so pretending to be her boyfriend—even if only for show—filled him with secret delight.

"You always take care of me. Helping you is the least I can do," Wanyu replied with a smile.

Hu Yifei, seeing how Zhanbo had refused her so many times but agreed happily to Wanyu’s offer, felt a pang of jealousy. She walked to the sofa and asked Xiao Xie and Zeng Xiaoxian, "Do you really think she’s more suitable than me?"

Zeng Xiaoxian pointed at Wanyu with a mischievous grin. "How could she compare to you? She’s a goddess! Hahaha..."

Zeng Xiaoxian hadn’t laughed for long before Hu Yifei, enraged, pressed a cushion to his face and pummeled him on the sofa.

"Congratulations, Miss Lin Wanyu. Tomorrow, you’ll be the leading lady in this little drama. Go home and study your script. Here’s how it goes: tomorrow, Wanyu, you go see Zhanbo, so everyone at his company will see he has such a beautiful girlfriend. That’ll make them all envious," Xiao Xie said with a smile to Lin Wanyu.

"Thank you, director! I’ll make the most of this opportunity," Wanyu replied, feigning delight and matching Xiao Xie’s performance.

"But tomorrow isn’t my birthday. Wouldn’t it be a bit obvious if she just showed up?"

Xiao Xie sized Zhanbo up and replied in a deliberately irritating tone, "No worries. You’re always over-the-top anyway."

"Wanyu could bring him lunch!" Zeng Xiaoxian suggested. "Every girl makes a special lunch for the boy she likes!"

"Teacher Zeng, have you watched too many Korean dramas? Ask them if they can cook! If they can’t even manage a meal, how are they going to make a lunchbox? Raise your hand if you can’t make a lunchbox," Xiao Xie said disdainfully.

Hu Yifei and Wanyu raised their hands in unison. For reasons unknown, Zhanbo raised his hand as well.

"Hmm?" Xiao Xie and Zeng Xiaoxian stared at Zhanbo with bemused expressions. Zhanbo gave an awkward laugh and quickly lowered his hand.

"Fine, I’ll do it myself! I’ll make a super romantic everlasting love lunchbox—guaranteed to put out Zhao Wuliang’s arrogance!" Zeng Xiaoxian shook his head, then strutted off to the kitchen, feeling quite pleased with himself.